Why I Told My Diabetes Doctor to Back Off
Let me just say it. I hate diabetes. I hate it. Oh, I know that it can be managed (I do) and that you can live a good, long life (I am — 27 years with Type 1 diabetes). But still, I hate it. And one of the reasons I hate it is that, for me, it has been so difficult to find a good doctor who’s not going to judge me and make me feel bad when my numbers are not in range. Not wanting to be judged, hassled, scolded or embarrassed for my diabetes self care, literally keeps me from going to the doctor as often as I should. Period. And I’m willing to bet that many of my fellow people with diabetes agree with me. So trust me when I say that rarely ever does chastisement motivate. Not for me anyway.
And to complicate my personal diabetes management even further, I work in the diabetes industry, and because I know many of the big players in the field, it impacts my career as well. Would they look at me differently if they knew that for the last week I’ve been struggling with my blood glucose levels and I’ve been averaging around 220? Would I be viewed as any less credible or talented or capable? Would they scoff and say, “She should know better”? Well, I’ve got news for you, diabetes is its own wild animal, and just like being in the wild, it is often unpredictable and random. Diabetes shifts day to day, even moment by moment. If I was confident that every time I took one unit of insulin, my blood sugars would come down in the same exact manner, this condition would be a whole different dynamic. But it’s rarely ever the same. So I struggle on, trying to catch the wav Continue reading